July, July…how you’ve flown by. This was probably the most life-pivoting July I’ve experienced thus far, new chapter manuscripts piling into my hands.
Take a breather with me and look at some currents from July.
North Shore Massachusetts
I planned the first overnight family trip for July 4th; I didn’t plan on returning the next weekend.
Over six hours on public transportation alone emptied my energy reserves. The last day trip itself, though, filled my heart. I’ve been to the North Shore a few times in the last month or two, and I leave with an enmeshment of relief and sadness wrestling in my chest. Belonging and warmth hug me each time I’m in a coastal town, my hand resisting the urge to pinch myself. And sadness slaps me realizing I’m leaving “home”.
I can’t wait to be back.
Future Insecurity
This feels like time 1,000,000 staring at my future in terror, at this point. I think I’ve mentioned it before, but me “starting a new chapter” isn’t as freeing as it feels for many.
Don’t get me wrong; I am excited about the path ahead. I’m just also working through trauma responses that don’t allow joy/excitement from great news and a need for certainty. (Yay always being afraid you’ll lose good things?)
I wish I could shine the light on everything right now — patience, though.
New Music Recs
It started in the middle of the month with a recommendation from one of our lovely readers in the comments. They said to give :Wumpscut: a try, which gave me a new playlist idea. I added a couple of the popular songs I found/liked, picked another artist recommended under the artist page, and repeated.
Here’s the outcome full of artists I’d never heard of before.
Regulation Practice
Last month’s rollercoaster track added multiple corkscrew and hills increasing in quantity and height. Just as I attempted an exit to feel my feet on solid ground, the ride attendant Life closed the lap bars and sent me on another go…and another one again.
It’s been a minute since I’ve had such difficulty regulating my emotions, honestly, and it was indeed a challenge. I experienced more emotional highs and lows in a short time period than I did in almost four months. Remembering coping skills while the “soft spots” in your psyche get lashed is an (at least) annual life test; I’d grade myself a 70%.
What have you been up to this month? I’d love to hear what your summer vibes include so far.
The Soft Sea Witch 
Let’s Discuss!