The Soft Sea Witch

I’ve paid more attention to the things I gravitate toward — the media I ingest, the aesthetics that feel like home, the little obsessions that come and go. It feels like I’m quietly getting to know myself again, and I want to track the tidbits I (re)discover with you.

These are the currents I’ve been caught in this April. Maybe you’ll drift into some of these, too.

Tunes from My Roots

I never stopped being a goth kid at heart, but my self-expression and music focuses changed for a while. (I worked in metal and classic rock for a few years, so Spotify heavily jammed 70s and 80s rock/metal bands.) Now that I’m engaging with the community here in New England, I rediscovered some high school favorites. And I have my April playlist showcasing some for you here!

Yeah, you see HIM there; we won’t talk about the thing I had for Ville Valo. Even if they aren’t “goth rock”, I embrace my humble mall goth entrance through Dark Light. It got me discovering classics like The Cure, Siouxsie and the Banshees, and The Sisters of Mercy.

Fun & Colorful Makeup Again

Makeup is something I’ve loved since I was 23 years old. I did some makeup younger than that, but that was when I experimented and sought out technique. Since I was 23 in 2016, I honed my skills during the wild/no “clean” makeup days. Creativity ran rampant on Instagram feeds and YouTube algorithms just as quickly as the beauty influencer drama did. Winged liner, cut creases, halo eyes, ombre lips…you name it, I learned it. It was a blast (and still is to look back on even if some experimental choices make me cringe).

Over the last year settling into New England life, most of my makeup choices were minimal (basically almost nothing). I was too frazzled and depressed to do anything more than passable or “decent”. Hanging out in Providence and finding community in the local goth scene, though, awoke my desire to pull out the colorful eyelids and weird blush/lip colors again. It also awoke another love…

A Wardrobe More…Me

Before a goth night in the middle of the month, I hadn’t dressed with intention for myself in several months, seeking approval from my partner at the time when I did. Finding and putting effort into looking like a human is also difficult when you work from home and rarely leave.

I’ve enjoyed exploring unfamiliar brands and bookmarking simple, but stylish pieces. I’ve splurged on cool pants that make me happy. (Fellow short queens understand how rare flare pants our length are.) Looking cute feels fun and free of external validation for the first time in at least five years. I can’t wait to find more energy to play dress-up and show off outfits.